Of course you have the right

Of course you have the right
to choose not to fight for anything.

The right to be happy, to relax,
to think you are that such a great person
who does not owe anyone and who works,
pays their taxes and votes when they should.

Of course you have the right
to mind your own business.
To listen to the news
as an unsettling hum.
Not to get into trouble
that does not affect you at all.

As if any life whatsoever
was not difficult in the first place.

Of course you have the right
to wrap yourself within your kin.
Today, it is a blessing to have anyone.
And… for tomorrow:
everything is so shaky!

Of course you have the right
to take refuge. Like you, I too wish
for the immense power to think of nothing.

It is true, I envy you
because I have no one.

Of course you have the right
to be full of pride. No matter what,
you stand tall. The people who know you,
they know how much you have endured.
How much suffering, how much effort,
all of your sacrifice and your steadfastness.
The respect you have always shown
for your bosses and friends.
How you shape and adapt,
and how you usually smile
and always reply to all salutations.

Of course you have the right
to peace of mind.
You do your job, you obey,
you are punctual and you complete
all your tasks. You are loyal
and grateful. And your entire
social group knows it is counting
on you. Together, you have protected
all of your interests.
You have not allowed anyone to
humiliate, insult, or steal from any of you.

And me, a poor useless hypocrite,
a repulsive outcast, who defends
any cause for no other reason
but to scream scandalously,
pleading for scraps of attention!
…like crumbs from a table…

Of course you have the right
to ignore me. [It is not but…]
Because of people like me,
this country is going nowhere!
I have resentments, traumas,
vices and madness.
Just this irascible, unstable
person who cannot tolerate himself.

There is one sole thing
I want to beg of you…
It is just that…
ever since I was born, I have
been plagued by this deep
unbearable nausea.

I never understood what it all meant.
I do not like it. Every little detail, the organisations,
the protocols, the hierarchies, every written rule
and every etiquette convention, every celebration,
rally, meeting, party or assembly, every ideological faction,
any kind of workers union and guerrilla group: everything!…
Yes! Everything in the entire universe disgusts me to the core!

You cannot imagine how many times I have wished
to put an end to this misery! There is nothing else
I can hope for but to put an end to that:
Once and for all!

Why do not you, please,
come and help me
get rid of this suffering?

Deep down,
I know it!
I am a coward:
Infinitely so!

A disappointing coward…
Just like you!

JCM